Time Gets Better With Age

Read it through to the end, it gets better as you go!

I've learned that I like my teacher because she cries when we sings

"Silent Night". Age 5

I've learned that our dog doesn't want to eat my broccoli either. Age 7

I've learned that when I wave to people in the country, they stop what

they are doing and wave back. Age 9

I've learned that just when I get my room the way I like it, Mom makes

me clean it up again. Age 12

I've learned that if you want to cheer yourself up, you should try

cheering someone else up. Age 14

I've learned that although it's hard to admit it, I'm secretly glad my

parents are strict with me. Age 15

I've learned that silent company is often more healing than words of

advice. Age 24

I've learned that brushing my child's hair is one of life's great

pleasures. Age 26

I've learned that wherever I go, the world's worst drivers have followed

me there. Age 29

I've learned that if someone says something unkind about me, I must live

so t hat no one will believe it. Age 30

I've learned that there are people who love you dearly but just don't

know how to show it. Age 42

I've learned that you can make some one's day by simply sending them a

little note. Age 44

I've learned that the greater a person's sense of guilt, the greater his

or her need to cast blame on others. Age 46

I've learned that children and grandparents are natural allies. Age 47

I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today,

life does go on, and  it will be better tomorrow. Age 48

I've learned that singing "Amazing Grace" can lift my spirits for hours.

Age 49

I've learned that motel mattresses are better on the side away from the

phone. Age 50

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a man by the way he handles

these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas

tree lights. Age 51

I've learned that keeping a vegetable garden is worth a medicine cabinet

full of pills. Age 52

I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your&n bsp;parents, you

miss them terribly after they die. Age 53

I've learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a

life. Age 58

I've learned that if you want to do something positive for your

children, work to improve your marriage. Age 61

I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. Age 62

I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catchers mitt on

both hands. You need to be able to throw something back. Age 64

I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will elude  ;you. But if you

focus on your family, the needs of others, your work, meeting new

people, and doing the very best you can, happiness will find you. Age 65

I've learned that whenever I decide something with kindness, I usually

make the right decision. Age 66

I've learned that everyone can use a prayer. Age 72

I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one. Age 82

I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone.

People love that human touch-holding hands, a warm hug, or  just a

friendly pat on the back. Age 90

I've learned that I still have a lot to learn. Age 92

I've learned that you should pass this one on to someone you care about.

Sometimes they just need a little something to make them smile

TeeHee

A wife takes a lover home during the day while her

husband is at work.   The 9-year old son comes home

early, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to

watch.  Unexpectedly, the woman's husband also comes

home.

She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that

the little boy is already in there.  The little boy

says, "Dark in here."  The man says, "Yes, it is."   

Boy:  "I have a baseball."   Man: "That's nice"   

Boy:  "Want to buy it?"   Man: "No, thanks."   Boy: 

"My Dad's outside."   Man: "OK, how much?"   Boy: 

"$250" 

Weeks later, it happens that the boy and the  lover

find themselves in the closet again.   Boy: "Dark in

here."   Man: "Yes, it is." Boy: "I have a baseball

glove."   The lover, remembering the last time, asks

the boy,  "How much?"    Boy: "$750"    Man: "Sold"

 A few days later, the Dad says to the boy, "Grab your

glove, let's go outside and have game of catch."   The

boy says, "I can't, I sold my baseball and my  glove."

The Dad asks,  "How much did you sell them for?"   

Boy: "$1,000"  The Dad says, "That's terrible to rip

off your friends like that...that is way more than

those two things cost. I'm taking you to  church, to

confession."

In church, the Dad makes sure the boy goes in to the

confessional and closes the door.  The boy says, "Dark

in here."   The priest says, "Don't start that shit

again; you're in my closet now."